In both fiction writing and sales, the way you use language can make or break your connection with the audience. One key aspect that significantly affects the quality of communication is the choice between active and passive voice. If you’re a writer or salesperson looking to make your message clearer, more engaging, and impactful, the solution is simple: use active voice.

Just as a good story captivates readers, effective sales communication can capture and retain a customer’s interest. But how do we achieve this? The answer lies in the structure of our sentences. In fiction writing, active voice is 99% of the time better than passive voice. This principle holds equally true in sales, where clear and direct communication is paramount. Let’s explore why active voice is superior, how to identify it, and how it can revolutionise your sales communication.

What is the Difference Between Active and Passive Voice?

Understanding the difference between active and passive voice is crucial. Let’s break it down:

• Active Voice: In active sentences, the subject performs the action. This structure typically follows a straightforward pattern: subject → verb → object. For example, “The salesperson closed the deal.” Here, ‘the salesperson’ is the subject actively performing the action of ‘closing’ the deal.

• Passive Voice: In passive sentences, the subject receives the action. The structure often involves a form of the verb “to be” combined with a past participle. For instance, “The deal was closed by the salesperson.” In this case, the subject (the deal) is passive, receiving the action rather than performing it.

While both structures are grammatically correct, their impact on the reader or listener differs significantly. Active voice is direct, dynamic, and engaging, while passive voice can be vague, less engaging, and often leads to wordiness.

Why Active Voice is Better in Fiction Writing

In fiction, active voice creates a sense of immediacy and excitement. It keeps readers hooked by making the narrative more vivid and alive. Here’s why active voice works better:

1. Clarity and Simplicity: Active voice is clear and to the point. It allows readers to easily understand who is doing what, making the narrative more accessible. For instance, “The dragon breathed fire” is clearer than “Fire was breathed by the dragon.”

2. Engagement: Active sentences make the action feel more immediate and engaging. They draw readers into the story and make them feel as if they are experiencing the events firsthand. When readers can see the character actively doing something, they feel more connected to the story.

3. Pacing: Active voice contributes to a faster-paced narrative. It keeps the story moving and helps maintain the reader’s interest. Passive voice can slow down the narrative, making it feel sluggish and less engaging.

4. Character Agency: Active voice highlights the actions of characters, making them appear proactive and dynamic. It reinforces the idea that characters are driving the plot, not just passively experiencing events.

Applying the Active Voice Principle to Sales

Just as active voice enhances fiction writing, it also improves sales communication. Here’s how using active voice can transform your sales strategy:

1. Improves Clarity and Understanding

   In sales, clarity is crucial. Active voice ensures that your message is direct and easy to understand. It leaves no room for ambiguity, making it clear who is doing what. For example, instead of saying, “Our product can be used to solve your problems,” say, “Our product solves your problems.” The latter is more straightforward and leaves no doubt about the product’s capability.

2. Engages the Customer

   Sales is about engaging with customers, not just talking at them. Active voice makes your communication more engaging and personal. It involves the customer directly by making them a part of the conversation. Compare “Your needs are understood by us” with “We understand your needs.” The active sentence feels more personal and direct, fostering a stronger connection with the customer.

3. Builds Trust and Credibility

   Using active voice shows confidence in your product or service. It conveys certainty and reliability, which are crucial for building trust. Passive sentences can sometimes feel evasive or less confident. For instance, “Issues will be resolved by our team” sounds less confident than “Our team will resolve your issues.” The active voice instils confidence and assures the customer of your capabilities.

4. Encourages Action

   Sales success often hinges on the ability to inspire action. Active voice creates a sense of urgency and prompts customers to act. Instead of saying, “A discount is offered to those who sign up today,” say, “Sign up today and get a discount.” The active voice is more compelling and encourages immediate action.

5. Enhances Persuasion

   The art of sales is about persuasion. Active voice is naturally more persuasive because it’s direct and to the point. It avoids unnecessary words and cuts straight to the chase, making it easier to persuade the customer. For example, “Our service helps you save money” is more persuasive than “Money can be saved through our service.”

How to Transition from Passive to Active Voice in Sales Communication

Transitioning from passive to active voice can significantly improve the impact of your sales communication. Here’s a more detailed look at how you can implement these changes effectively:

1. Identify the Subject and Action

Start by identifying who is performing the action in your sentence. If the doer is not immediately clear, you’re likely using passive voice. Rewrite the sentence to make the subject perform the action.

• Example in Passive Voice: “The contract was signed by the client yesterday.”

  In this sentence, “the contract” is the subject, but it’s not clear who performed the action until you get to the end of the sentence. The action (signing) feels disconnected from the subject.

• Rewritten in Active Voice: “The client signed the contract yesterday.”

  Now, “the client” is the subject, performing the action of signing. This makes the sentence clearer and puts the focus directly on who did what. In sales, clarity is crucial for avoiding misunderstandings and keeping communication straightforward.

Practical Application: When reviewing sales emails or scripts, always ask, “Who is performing the action?” If it’s not clear, you might be using passive voice. Make it a habit to identify the subject and ensure they are clearly performing the action in your sentences.

2. Eliminate Excess Words

Passive sentences often contain extra words or phrases, such as forms of “to be” (is, was, were) and “by.” Look for opportunities to remove these and make the sentence more concise.

• Example in Passive Voice: “The report will be reviewed by the team before it is sent to the client.”

  This sentence uses extra words that could be streamlined for brevity and clarity.

• Rewritten in Active Voice: “The team will review the report before sending it to the client.”

  By removing unnecessary words, the sentence becomes shorter and more direct. Active voice sentences get to the point faster, which is essential in sales, where every word counts.

Practical Application: Go through your sales materials and look for phrases that can be shortened. Words like “is,” “was,” and “by” are often indicators of passive constructions. Challenge yourself to find a more direct way to convey the same message.

3. Practise Rewriting

Take examples from your sales scripts, emails, or marketing materials, and practise rewriting them in active voice. The more you practise, the more natural it will become.

• Passive Voice Example: “The new features were designed to improve user experience.”

• Rewritten in Active Voice: “We designed the new features to improve user experience.”

  The active version is clearer and puts the focus on the company’s actions, highlighting their role in improving user experience.

Practical Application: Set aside time regularly to review and rewrite sections of your existing sales materials. Practise transforming passive sentences into active ones. This exercise not only improves your skills but also refreshes your content, making it more engaging and impactful.

4. Use Strong Verbs

Active voice benefits from strong, specific verbs. Instead of generic verbs like “is” or “are,” use action verbs that convey the specific action taking place.

• Example in Passive Voice: “The proposal is being considered by the board.”

• Rewritten in Active Voice with Strong Verb: “The board is evaluating the proposal.”

  “Evaluating” is a stronger, more specific verb than “considering.” It paints a clearer picture of what the board is actually doing. Strong verbs convey the action more vividly, making your communication more powerful.

Practical Application: Look for opportunities to replace weak or generic verbs in your sales communication with stronger, more specific ones. Words like “make,” “do,” and “is” can often be replaced with more descriptive verbs that give a clearer sense of action. This change makes your language more vibrant and engaging.

5. Be Mindful of Your Audience

Remember that the goal is to communicate effectively with your audience. Use active voice to make your message clear, engaging, and persuasive.

• Passive Example: “It has been decided that a new pricing model will be implemented to benefit customers.”

  This passive sentence doesn’t specify who made the decision or how it will benefit customers, making it less personal and persuasive.

• Rewritten in Active Voice: “We have decided to implement a new pricing model to benefit you.”

  This version directly addresses the customer, creating a sense of connection and making the message more persuasive. It also clarifies who is taking action, which builds trust and transparency.

Practical Application: When crafting sales messages, always keep your audience in mind. Ask yourself how your message will be received. Does it clearly show who is responsible for the action? Does it engage the customer directly? Using active voice helps to personalise communication and make it more relatable.

Conclusion: Mastering Active Voice for Sales Success

By focusing on these strategies, you can transform your sales communication into something much more compelling and effective. Identifying the subject and action, eliminating excess words, practising rewriting, using strong verbs, and being mindful of your audience are all techniques that will make your sales messages clearer and more engaging.

Active voice isn’t just a grammatical choice—it’s a powerful tool for clarity, engagement, and persuasion. Whether you’re writing a sales email, pitching a new client, or crafting marketing copy, remember that being active in your communication will always yield better results. By taking charge of your language, you take charge of your sales narrative, ensuring that your message is not only heard but felt. So make the active choice, and watch your sales soar.